I recently read an article written by a man pleading with women to stop referring to their husbands as one of the children. He felt it was disrespectful and he was offended by these comments made all too often in his presence by women. I meant to attach a link to the article, but I can’t find it, because I suck at computers.
This article got me thinking. I am guilty of referring to my husband as my first-born child. I do not mean any disrespect by it, to me I am simply stating a fact. I certainly don’t mean to offend other men by making these comments. After all, I am not referring to you, I don’t know what goes on in your house. Frankly, I am offended that you took offense to my comments about my husband. So, there. Mind your business.
Anywho, he went on about equal partnership and he referred to what the bible says about marriage between a man and a woman and yada yada yada. I am catholic. I have read the bible. We are not living in biblical times. The bible also says;
Don’t cut your hair nor shave. (Leviticus 19:27)
Don’t wear clothes made of more than one fabric (Leviticus 19:19)
So, if you are going to quote the bible and say we should abide by its laws, you should abide by all of them and not be a hypocrite and pick and choose the ones that suit your needs only.
Now, back to my man-child husband. It was not evident that he was so needy until after the children were born. I was very happy to care for him and dote on him before we had kids. Then the babies started coming and I had to switch gears. They simply cannot do for themselves, but he can. However, he must not have gotten the memo.
He comes home from work, he takes his clothes off where he stands. His favorite place to put dirty laundry is on the floor, mere inches from where the hamper is.
He sits at the dinner table with the kids as I serve everyone, and that is fine with me. Then he says, “I need a fork. Can you get me a cup with ice? Pass the soda?”. His legs are not broken and he is not blind. Oh how I would love it if he would just set the table before dinner. Now that’s hot.
Lastly, though not really because I could list 100 more things but I don’t want to lose your interest, I ask him to change and dress our daughter in the morning so I can finish getting myself and the boys ready for the day. So while I am putting Quinn’s shoes and socks on, I always hear, “Jennie, can you bring me a diaper? I need the wipes. Wear is her outfit? Does she need a hat?”. You really aren’t helping me if I have to stop what I am doing to help you. I have said that exact line to him hundreds of times but he just stares at me blankly like he no hablo ingles.
Now, I would be an excellent housewife that did absolutely everything that was domestic related if I was solely a housewife. Since I am expected to work, I think he should be expected to help out a little. No one ever has to ask me to go food shopping or clean the toilets or attend parent teacher conferences. I hate having to ask him to do anything, nevermind having to ask repeatedly. He should just know what has to be done and want to do it because he is being the dutiful husband to my dutiful housewife.
I can only speak for myself here but as a wife, the last thing I want to be is a nag to my husband. The second to last thing I want to be is his mother. I have to keep after him about getting things done the same way I have to keep after my kids. If he doesn’t want to be called a child, then don’t act like one. Besides, if he pitched in and did a mere twenty percent of the chores around the house, that is twenty percent more time we could be having sex. Only in the ways permitted by the bible, of course 😉