Liam is in a battle with ADHD and right now the ADHD is winning. I am partly to blame. I agreed with his father to take him off his medication because I knew the only way his father would realize that the medicine is necessary would be for him to see how Liam was without it. So now we are bombarded with notes from his teacher about his behavior and inattentiveness all while dealing with a cranky, unhappy Liam who feels like he can’t do anything right.
There is more to it than that. Liam also makes no effort at all to control his impulses or to try to pay attention. I don’t know if that is because he really and truly can’t make an effort or if he just doesn’t want to. I would like it and appreciate it if he would make an effort to be aware of what he is doing and try to modify his behavior.
I would also like all the parts of his 504 plan to be implemented, not just some of them. Why does the plan clearly state that he will be given special accommodations for tests but only now has the teacher said they can’t provide those accommodations? What’s the point of hammering out that plan if we are going to follow it half assed?
While his teacher is mostly wonderful, she is doing nothing by telling him he is annoying her and telling him he is exhausting and announcing to the kids that she doesn’t care if she is hurting their feelings. No good is going to come from that, she is only further damaging his already fragile self esteem.
Truthfully, I’m worn out. Managing his ADHD is supposed to be a collaborative effort, but I am the only one participating in it. Just as his teacher is tired of hearing excuses from him, I’m tired of hearing that everything is his fault. He’s nine! I’ve had ten meetings with this teacher. They are all the same. “He is extremely intelligent but I lose him during the day and I don’t know where he goes. He isn’t even aware that he has drifted off. He has to make more of an effort. He has to grow up. It isn’t his fault , I know he has no control over it”. Am I supposed to have an answer for this? He’s my first kid. I’m learning as I go. I don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong and what might work today might be wrong tomorrow. I know the kid needs his meds, they help. I know he needs to burn off steam and I know he needs reminders. I know he is nine and he acts like he is nine. I don’t know if he can pay attention just because he wants to and I don’t know if he has any control over his impulsivity or his daydreaming. I don’t know if I am doing the right thing by him, but I’m pretty sure his school isn’t either. I know he is mine, he is awesome and I love him. I think his teacher needs an anti cranky pill and a vacation.